BJJ in Omaha

I finally got to train in Omaha!  One of my roommates went out of town this weekend and let me use her car, so I drove over to train with Team Rodrigo Vaghi Omaha-North.  I called in advance to make sure they would be there and it was ok if I came, and the ensuing conversation was rather interesting.  Trying to explain where I'm from (New York?  Tennessee?), how long I've been training (8 years, but really more like 3-4), where I'm staying (at the zoo...), it seemed like I couldn't give him a straightforward answer to anything.  In any case, he told me that Saturdays were just open mat, but I was welcome to come on over.

I didn't have any trouble finding the place, although I drove right by it the first time, and let's just say the streets of Omaha aren't the friendliest to out-of-towners.  There weren't any signs indicating there was a BJJ school, as it was a youth center or something like that.  I walked in and found three guys in a wrestling room, and figured I was in the right place.  They invited me in, and the head teacher, Dana Taylor, gave me a fun lesson on takedowns--mostly arm drags and two on one.  He had to leave soon though, so the other two who were working together took me in and one of them, Greg, continued the lesson.  We did a little bit from the knees as well, and then it was time to go.  Unfortunately, we didn't really have a chance to get any rolling in, although given the size difference between us I'm not quite sure I'm unhappy about that.  It was just nice to get moving again after a month without BJJ.

In zoo news, we've been working on some fun stuff, like tigers, aye-ayes, tapirs (I pulled blood on one!) and stingrays.

Also, I finally got offered a job!!!  It's in Las Vegas (technically it's Henderson, but who cares??), doing exactly what I want to do--mostly small animal private practice, with some zoo animals thrown in (they see a lot of the show animals from the strip).  I probably won't start until late June or July, but I'm already looking into BJJ schools there.  So far I've heard Mica Cipili's school and Drysdale's school are the places to go, but they're kind of far and there are a TON of options.  I was really looking for something closer to where I work, and Epic Training Center is less than a mile away.  As far as I can tell, it started out affiliated with Drysdale, but it appears that those instructors are no longer there and Fredson Paixao now runs the BJJ program.  That would be ideal, and honestly at my current level I don't need THE absolute best instruction--I think as long as I can feel at home, and I will be able to get there with some regularity, it will be just fine.

Thoughts?  Suggestions?  I'm open to it!!

Yay for free time!

Which I finally get on Field Services.  I have to say, it's actually kind of nice to have weekends off.  Plus, I was able to go to class on Saturday AND last night!  AND I went to the gym today!  I think my body might rebel tomorrow morning though. 

Saturday women's class:
Michelle (who needed knee surgery a few months ago) was finally back in class for the first time, which was nice--it meant that women's class was more than just me and Jess!  I started us on a super-careful warm-up, and then Jess taught us the foot-in-hip guard pull, followed by a takedown from that position.  There was a lot of adjusting to make sure Michelle would be able to do it, since her leg was still pretty weak. 

Regular class:
We started with some quick takedowns, and then did a sweep series.  It starts from getting stacked while attempting an armbar from guard, and moved on from there.  We finished with some open rolling, which resulted in playing the avoid-the-n00b game.

Monday night class:
There were only six of us there, four blue belts and two white belts who were really new.  After the warm-up, we started with the knee-through pass and some new details, and then moved on to the "windshield-wiper" pass (knee-through but it's the same-side knee).  Finished with 3-minute rounds of open rolling, with everyone in the class, so I didn't really get to avoid the new guys.  Luckily, they were fairly tame, although one guy (after multiple sweeps and triangle/armbar attempts) told me at the end, "good job." In that tone.  That condescending tone, like I'm a child who he was just playing with.  Eh.  We'll see who plays with who next time. 

On another note, I've been attempting to somewhat fix my diet as well.  It's been pretty terrible lately, and consists of either me not eating real meals and making up for it with pre-packaged snacks, or the Indian version of Ramen noodles.  I've decided to start packing a salad every day for lunch, which should a)get me eating vegetables again, which sort of disappeared from my diet, and b)actually get me eating lunch and not granola bars or peanut butter sandwich crackers washed down with soda. 

Starting 2012 off the right way!

And by that, of course I mean with some good ol' BJJ.

No, I haven't vanished or died or suffered from amnesia.  I just haven't been able train lately, due in large part to school/slave labor hours (80 hours a week of overnight shifts is NOT fun, no matter what someone else may try to tell you).  Today was the first time in over a month that I was able to hit the mats, and of course I felt like ass.  Honestly though, I was just glad that our coach decided to have open mat today.

My first roll was with a very strong, solid blue belt.  I spent the entire time feeling like I was slowly getting rolled over by a boulder.  And once I got smushed enough to tap, it started all over again.  At least it was nice and slow, so I had a chance to warm up and stretch out some.  My next roll was with another very strong, but very shiny-new-blue belt who I could play with a little more.  Not that I could do anything, but just that it was a little quicker.  I was glad to finally see him and congratulate him on the belt, as our last belt testing was in early December, the same day I had to take the NAVLE (aka 7-hour-long national veterinarian board exam aka the "let's-make-you-feel-stupid" test).  After that, I had a few more rolls, which were a little quicker, but with the lack of recent rollage (and bare minimum of exercise), not to mention sleep deprivation, I was pooped pretty quick.  Plus, I didn't want to feel like complete garbage tomorrow.  I know how hard it is on my body to take weeks off of BJJ and then jump right back in, and I didn't want to deal with that.  

BJJ goals for 2012:
1) Train.
2) No really...just train.  That's it.

Life goals for 2012:
1) Find a job that fits my professional goals and will let me train BJJ. 

Which leads to my New Year's resolution for 2012:
1) Spend at least half an hour a day, and an hour on weekends, looking for a job or working on my job application skills/materials.  Speaking of which, does anyone know any vets who are hiring? 
2) Work out at least three times a week, even if it's just some tabatas at home.  Does anyone have any suggestions on how to work up the motivation for this after a long day at work?  I often find myself unwilling to hit the gym on days I finish at 7 because it's already so late, and on days when I finish closer to 5, I can't bear the thought of the crowds (which will be even worse with all the new year's resolutions).  I tell myself I'll just do something when I get home, and of course I just sit at my computer messing around, maybe being productive 25% of the time.  

Awesome takedown

Where have I been the past few weeks? 

Well, for one, getting a black eye while I'm on vacation.

 Ignore the hideously unplucked eyebrows.  It actually developed a little more under my eye the next day, and it looked like I had some funky eyeshadow going on, but it really wasn't that bad.  Note to self: Do NOT allow the edge of your eye to come in contact with your instructor's cro-magnon forehead. 

Also, I've had my family visiting for the first time since I came to Tennessee!

Family + Smoky Mountains

It was nice having them come, and I finally got to introduce them to my friends and BJJ family. 

Also, I've been ultrasounding stingrays and metal-scanning penguins, among other fun things!

So, you ask: where on Earth have I been finding time for BJJ?  I've managed to squeeze it in here and there, and this morning was definitely worth it.  It was just me for the women's class, so I rolled/gossiped with Jess for awhile, then she showed me a cool takedown.  Maybe not suitable for people way huger than me, but still awesome nonetheless.  A new girl, Briana, came to the open class.  She's a blue belt from Memphis, and a sophomore at UT, AND close to my size!  It was really nice to finally find someone who is my rank and my size, and we had a really good roll.  I pointed out all the cool people for her to roll with, which was especially important today because we had some visiting students, which included some white belts who I didn't know at all.

Also, I've joined Fitocracy.  Maybe I've been "gaming" the system a little, doing some things just to complete quests, but at least I know I can still run a mile in under 8 minutes.  7:22 when I've barely been training for it--boo ya!

So share with me--what cool things has Fitocracy pushed you to do that you wouldn't otherwise be doing? 

Saturday class

The women's class this morning was a little...sparse.  I showed up while the kickboxing class was still going on, which Jess does.  I got changed and sat around for awhile after 10, thinking that maybe the schedule changed and the women's class started at 10:30 now--until I asked Jess what time we were starting, and they all realized their kickboxing class had gone over.  It didn't really matter much, though, because I was the only one who showed up for the women's class. 

We managed to convince Nicole, the lady who teaches the kickboxing class, to join in for BJJ, and since it was just us three we also invited a new guy who was in the previous class to stay as well.  Nicole only had a little BJJ somewhere else, and the guy had none, so Jess kind of did an intro lesson for them.  They picked up things like forward rolls, backward rolls, shrimping, and break falls REALLY fast, and then she moved on to armbar from mount and the upa escape from underneath mount (which Nicole called "buck and roll"...that made me lolz a little).  The guy was decently sized, and both of them are pretty damn strong, but they had really good body awareness and I was impressed at how quickly they learned things, and how controlled they were when we did a little bit of open rolling at the end of class. 

For me, Jess showed a variation on a cross choke from guard, and taking the back when someone sprawls.  It worked off of a side control escape she showed me a few weeks ago.  After rolling, she also went over some small things to improve my game, which mostly involved making more aggressive grips.  Combined with Jack's little lesson on grips from open guard over at Jiu Jitsu Forums, I tried to put it all together for next class.

Open class was next, and there were only seven of us that showed up.  Apparently, Fall Festival is going on and we just can't compete with that.  Mike had us drill 30 guard passes apiece, any way we wanted, but starting with our posture broken down.  After, he went over a guard break to do when still broken down and hugging your opponent's chest, by making sure their hips were pinned between your legs, your body, and your arms.  I really need to work on that one.  Open rolling followed, where I (unsuccessfully) tried to work my grip game.  I got myself steamrolled by the Tucker boys

This is the first time I've done both the women's class and open in awhile, and I'm sure my body won't be happy tomorrow but it felt really good.  I figured I should take advantage of the rare weekend off.  I just wish I had a little more time/energy on weekdays to work out even a little, so it wouldn't hit me so hard when I do want to push myself on the weekends. 

And I finally got John's match uploaded to YouTube:

I should probably let this go

Leslie's last post on pulling guard got me to look at my own "guard-pull" attempts in tournaments.  I only intended on watching the beginning of the match, but I ended up watching the whole thing.  I always felt like I could have won if it was submission only or another minute longer, but I'm also pretty sure that my triangle at the end was a doomed attempt (she defended those really well!)  What I'm wondering is, at 3:35, would I have been better off working for an armbar?  Any other comments/suggestions about this match would also be appreciated! 

Tennessee State BJJ Championships

Yesterday our school headed down to Maryville for the annual TN State BJJ champs.  It's a pretty local tournament, and luckily not even a half hour away, so a lot of our guys (and some of our kids) were competing.  Unfortunately, none of our women were (vet school, injuries, etc.), but I was still looking forward to seeing what my competition would have been if I could have competed.  My boyfriend Ian was also competing, for the first time (and as a blue belt...talk about nerve-wracking).

I totally meant to go to the women's class before going to Maryville, but of course I totally overslept and woke up right after it started.  Later I found out Jess was the only one who showed up anyways, so while I didn't feel quite so guilty, I was annoyed that I missed an hour of rolling with her.


The kids' matches were still going on by the time I got there, and let me just say--damn.  Some of those kids are effin' amazing.  Yeah, there was a bit of silliness going on, but it always amazes me at what you can teach them and how well they can learn.  I saw one kid pull off a sweet uchimata.  And for the most part, they were all really good sports, along with their parents.  I know I shouldn't care so much, but it made my heart glow a little every time I saw a little girl win against boys, and I really hope that most of them stay with it.

The women got started while the kids were still going, and I was impressed at the number of white belts competing.  I couldn't really figure out how many weight classes they ended up with, but it seemed like everyone had at least one match (most had more) against someone close to their own weight.  It wasn't quite as large as the NAGA I went to in Atlanta, but I wouldn't have expected it to be anyways.  The blue belt division, unfortunately, was quite a bit smaller--for gi, there were only three girls, and two of them from the same school, so they had to go against each other.  One of them was Shakia, who I didn't even realize was there until she was fighting.  I saw her, and I was like, "Hey--that looks a lot like Shakia Harris!"  I'll let her talk about the match (if she wants to), but I will say that she did really well.  Her opponent had a lot of weight (and four stripes) on her, and it was a very solid, technical match, as opposed to a lot of the women's white belt matches--five minutes of whirling fury that honestly made me hope they don't get promoted and enter my division any time soon! 

At 1, they cleared the mats and had the black belt superfights.  Two of them involved my coaches, Mike Horihan (against Dave Vannest) and John Hosford (against Tommy Wales).  The third was Brandon Bledsoe vs. Adam Arebalo.  Mike, fresh off a successful black belt test, went first.

 Unfortunately he lost by one advantage.  I was behind the scoring table, so I couldn't see where Vannest got the extra advantage.  Brandon and Adam were next, so I took the opportunity to move to the other side of the gym so I could actually see the time left and score.  John went last, and won by three points.  Later, he told us he had been studying videos of this guy for months, and saw that no one could pass his half guard.  When he found himself stuck in that position, he decided to get in Tommy's full guard and pass that instead.

Once they were done, the men's gi matches resumed and Ian finally got to fight.  He lost his first match to some guy who was like two feet taller than him, but came out with his head held high.  His second match went better, and he defended well.  Unfortunately, he lost that one too, but I'm glad he gave it a try.  He's really not the competing kind of guy, and that's ok--it means that I'll always have someone to support me on the sidelines, who doesn't have to run off to his own matches!

We had success with the rest of our men's team as well--we went home with another two golds and two silvers that I can remember.  I wish we had a women's team, but hopefully we can get something together by the next tournament (and maybe I'll have a mildly lighter schedule).  While it seemed like there were quite a few open rings towards the second half of the day, when there were still plenty of matches left, overall I think this tournament went pretty well.  BJJ tourneys have gotten such a bad rep for being disorganized and running late that any kind of improvement is a huge step up, and I'm pretty sure our guys were done by five.  Honestly, it would have just seemed longer that it actually was because my butt was getting so sore from sitting on bleachers. 

Long-ass update.

Ok, I know it's been awhile, but clinics have been kicking my ass.  When I made my last post about the Pedro Sauer seminar, I was in Farm Animal, which had me working 80-90 hours a week.  Thankfully, nothing has been that busy since then, but it's still been way over the "normal" 40-hour work week.  I've also been trying to spend my free time studying for my board exam (which I scheduled for December 10, a mere ten weeks away!), so that sadly leaves little time for BJJ or blogging.  So here's a quick run down of what's been going on:

1.  Pedro Sauer seminar: Awesome!  I made it in for the second session, and we did a little review from the first session, followed by Q & A (which the first session was).  The thing is, he doesn't actually need to know the move needed.  He would ask someone to show what they were asking about, did it himself, and then came up with the answer because he knows the mechanics and bits and pieces of BJJ that well. 

2.  Clinics: After Farm Animal, I went over to Community Practice for three weeks.  This rotation is basically small animal private practice.  Since the majority of our other services are referral-based, this one was created to take care of the pets of staff, faculty,  and students of the vet school, along with other UT-associated peopl and, in some cases, people who somehow have a close relationship with UTCVM.  It was a lot of annual physicals and vaccinations, but also many simple problems that would be seen in private practice.  What was the most common problem?  BIG shocker: pet obesity! 

I'll say that again: Pet obesity was the #1 problem we saw.  Please, people, PLEASE put your pet on a controlled diet (i.e., feed them a set amount, not as much as they'll eat).  Do searches on Pub Med or Web of Science about obesity in pets, and they'll show you a myriad of health benefits from being leaner.  And if your vet tells you this as well, please accept it and try to work with them to help your pet.  After all, if we were "in it for the money," wouldn't we want them to be as fat as possible so they could get sick/arthritic/lame more often so we could make more money fixing them? 

Anyways, that was a fun rotation, but now it's over and I'm on Small Animal Surgery.  It's been pretty hectic, and there's been a lot to keep up with, but I've gotten lucky lately and somehow have a very light patient load this weekend.  I'll still be going in early this weekend to help out the other students on the rotation, but at least I personally don't have much to worry about.  Hopefully I'll be able to make it to Jess's women's class again tomorrow!  Which brings us to...

3.  The women's class!  It's been going really well, and we've been growing, slowly but surely.  Jess has been adding in more elements every class, and last time we did some stand-up self-defense.  It was the first time we did any stand-up, and I hope it will continue.  While she does rely on me to work with the newest people and coach them through things, she's also really good about making sure that I a) get in the drilling I need, but also b) learn slightly more advanced techniques that I can do while everyone else is doing the standard stuff.  I'm really glad that I get to help teach (I've been wanting to do it for a long time, and especially since I got my blue belt), so that alone would make the class worthwhile for me, but I really appreciate the fact that she doesn't forget about my growth as well.  Lately, this has been the only class I've been going to, since my weekdays are so busy and I have to get up early and go in to school on Saturdays as well, so by the time I get done with her class I'm kind of beat. 

4.  Lastly: my BJJ blogosphere friends make my heart smile.  Also, it's a lot more satisfying than you think to take the high road. 

In other news:  some teammates of mine are competing at the Tennessee State BJJ Championships on October 16 15, in Maryville.  If you're there, come say hi to the girl who is either cheering like crazy or studying on a smart-not-phone (thanks, big brother!)

Pedro Sauer Seminar

I can't believe I haven't posted this until now, but:

 

That's right.  Red and black belt Pedro Sauer is coming to Knoxville on Saturday for a seminar!  So I'm pretty sure there is no women's class, but yeah...this WAAAAYYYYY makes up for it.  Hopefully I'll be there for the morning session, but I might not get out of school in time.  It's not too late to attend, even if you haven't pre-registered!

The weekend that wasn't

Since when were weekends harder than weekdays?  When I'm on Farm Animal Medicine and Surgery, apparently.  This is a rotation that is supposed to be fun, and a lot of it is.  The unfortunate part is that they severely understaff the hospital so the students have to do all treatments, around the clock.  This means our hours suck.  We have to be there from 7 AM to 8 PM minimum every day, to make sure that every treatment from 8 AM to 8 PM is covered (overnight students take over after 8).  And we have to go in at 7 AM every weekend morning, and likely 7 PM weekend nights.  And I also had the luck of staying all of Saturday night into Sunday morning....and then come in again Sunday evening at 7.  Might I mention that I like my sleep? 

So of course BJJ gets kicked to the wayside.  I was hoping that we finished with 8 AM treatments by 9 AM on Saturday morning, so I could easily make it to the 10 AM women's class.  Of course, we didn't finish until after 10, so I showed up more than half an hour late to class.  And then I was so pooped from the week I couldn't stay for regular class after that.  No time/energy for working out, eating decently, grocery shopping, showering...I want my life back. 

On the plus side, I got to castrate a bull calf and do a cosmetic dehorn.  It left my pants looking like I was a serial killer, but it was so much fun! 

Calling all ladies!

Ok, so I guess I should have posted this a week ago.

ATTENTION EAST TENNESSEE LADIES!  Knoxville Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is proud to introduce its brand new Ladies-only BJJ class, held every Saturday morning from 10-11:15 AM.  It is taught by Jessica Martin, a Fabio Santos brown belt from San Diego.  ALL are welcome to attend, even if you train at other schools.  I'm not sure yet about pricing, but we should know more by this weekend and I'll post that info as soon as I know.  Not a lady?  Not near Knoxville?  Tell your friends! Visit the Knoxville BJJ website, Facebook page, or call at 865-951-1392 for more information.

Next, this time in the category of "That actually happened to me": I got recognized at Kroger from my blog.  I was wearing my UT College of Veterinary Medicine scrub top (brown, so the cow poop stains don't show as much) and somebody just came up to me and asked if I was The Grappling Vet!  (Hi, Rebecca!)  I never thought I would get recognized from my blog.  That was pretty cool, AND I found someone in Knoxville who is almost my exact weight!

Ladies' Classes!!!

I know I've been a bit delinquent in updating, but I do have some exciting news.  This Saturday, we finally started a women's BJJ class!  It's being taught by our brown belt, Jess, and I think she did a great job.  It was a small class, just myself and two other ladies, both wives of men who train--one had just started coming in to regular classes the past few weeks, the other had never had a formal class.  It was nice that she could keep it intimate to start, and hopefully make things more comfortable for them.  We started out with a brief warm-up and stretching, then got to the good stuff.  We did armbar from mount and the upa, keeping it basic.  I was her "teaching dummy," and when it came to drilling, we would each take one so we could walk them through it.  Jess didn't ignore my needs, though, and once they got the hang of each move she had them rep it on each other and let me drill the moves (albeit at a faster pace) on her.  We finished up with some open rolling and a quick cool-down/stretch session. 

I think this class is going to be a big step forward for the academy.  I've heard from far too many women that they just don't want to train with sweaty dudes and they don't feel comfortable with it, but I think this will be a great gateway drug for them.  Once they get hooked, they can stay for the open class right after the womens' class, and then hopefully come in during the week as well. 

My only problem?  There's a possibility I'm not going to make it in for the next...oh, three months or so.  Unfortunately, I just finished up with a bunch of rotations that gave me weekends completely off, and my next couple will have me coming in Saturday and Sunday mornings to do morning treatments on whatever patients I may have.  I'm hoping that I'll either be done in time to get to the 10 AM ladies class, or maybe I'll be able to convince the senior clinician to let me take off from 9:30 to 11:30 so I can "help" teach. 

On that note, I've also decided that upon graduation I am going to open a fat camp for dogs in Manhattan.  Apparently, there is not a single veterinary nutritionist on the entire island, and I KNOW there must be owners willing to pay money for their precious pet to lose some weight so they can live a longer, healthier life (refer to this article). 

Sure, nice sweep...

At the end of class today, we were doing some open rolling, and I was going with this one-stripe white belt.  He kept doing the patronizing, "nice sweep" or nice this or that...and then, when he "swept" me, actually said *mumble mumble* "nice sweep!"  Oh, and then he let me cross choke him.  So kind of him. 

I'm not sure I've ever had to deal with this kind of thing before, or at least not for awhile.  Honestly, it was just really weird.  Like, dude...I have rank on you.  Don't patronize me, and there's no need to compliment EVERY move, because then it makes you sound like a douche.  Especially when you talk about your own moves.  Also, throwing me across the mat because I'm half your size...not a sweep.  However, I heard that last week he came in with a big attitude problem, so at least he seems to be much improved from that class.  

Success!

And not because I triangled the spazzy n00b who told me to my face he had to win because he couldn't lose to a girl, but because I kept my cool and played my own game. 

Also, I got to do eye surgery last week!

That's me with the resident, Dr. Fischer.  And no, those aren't reading glasses--my glasses were sliding down and I couldn't push them back up myself. 

BJJ is definitely not a weekend warrior activity.

Or rather, a once-in-three-weekends activity.  I finally got back on the mats yesterday after three long weeks, and it was somewhat..uncomfortable, to say the least.  It also doesn't help that I haven't worked out at all in two weeks, and my joints were all stiff and uncomfortable.  But I had fun!  I thought I would get my ass kicked, but it wasn't so bad.  Even though I'm still paying for it now.

On another note, since it's still (sort of) spring: if you see baby bunnies or birds, LEAVE THEM ALONE, unless you can see they are visibly injured.  Their parents didn't abandon them; they're probably just waiting for YOU to leave.  You are NOT saving them when you abduct them. 

In case you can't tell, I'm currently on the Avian and Exotics rotation, which also includes wildlife.  And we get tons of babies that have absolutely nothing wrong with them, which a) decreases their chances for survival, and b) makes more unnecessary work for us.

I haven't disappeared...

yet.  Clinics don't start until Monday, but even though finals were done two weeks ago, I've still been so swamped I barely made it to jiu jitsu since the Friday finals were over.  We had Open House the weekend after, and then a presentation on Foot and Mouth Disease, and now this contract negotiation project...it seriously never ends, even when you think it does.

I did make it to open mat today (yesterday, really).  Rolled with my boyfriend for a while, which was kind of nice even though he has  70 pounds on me.  I had to goad him into unleashing "The Thunder," which he finally did after much coaxing and prodding.  I'm not sure how many times I have to tell him that it annoys me more when he goes easy on me and hands me submissions, but hopefully he'll get it now.  Worked a little on how to modify a triangle going bad.  Then one of our "family guys" shows up, whose daughters both train.  One of them is competing in May, so I rolled with her for a little while.  I'm so jealous--she's only 11 and she's already really good.  I'm sure she'll do well at the competition, but I gave her a few pointers anyways.  There was a pretty significant size difference, so I did have a little trouble telling if some of the stuff she was doing was because she was so much smaller, or just because she didn't know it.

On the plus side for today, all of us soon-to-be-fourth years got Sombreros and free lunch for our "Scrubbin' In" ceremony.  They even had pinatas stuffed with candy, AND "pin the testicles on the donkey." 

Belt test review...epic fail.

Warning: This is one of those rambling emotional posts...you might want to skip this one if you're sick of hearing about the waterworks. 

My instructors did a blue belt test review for me today, and unfortunately it looks like I don't know the curriculum as well as I thought I did.  We got there at 9, which gave us about two and a half hours until regular class started.  I thought that would have been plenty of time to do the review, and then maybe go grab some breakfast before class.

BIG mistake.  We barely finished in time.  It seemed like there was still material that I either didn't know, or saw just once before (and this too was from asking one of the blue belts who had recently tested, not from class).  Also, my jiu jitsu memory appears to be like a sieve--I can't remember anything until I've done it multiple times, even if I just did it the day before.  Then there were the moves that I thought I knew, but I was doing it wrong.  I know a big part of it is obviously me, but I can't help but feel frustrated at the fact that a lot of the curriculum is self-defense, which we don't really work on a whole lot.  I feel like I'm learning things just for a test, and I'm not really sure why these moves are deemed important enough to be in the curriculum but not so important that they're part of the regular rotation of moves taught in class.  Obviously I've had times where I've been out for weeks and I've had to miss classes, but there are just a lot of things that we don't do because they're not really what people come in to learn Brazilian Jiu Jitsu for.  Also, there's a lot of headlock defense stuff that we don't do too much of because...well, BJJ players don't really pull headlocks that much. Going over it again now, I think I know it.  I really need to drill this stuff next week, and go over it in my head at least two times a day.  I really owe them (and the coach's son, for coming in and being my throwing dummy) for coming in on a Saturday morning.

They started class as soon as my review finished.  I was really tired and wanted to go home, but felt bad just leaving as class was starting, so I took a quick break and came back in towards the end of the warm-up.  We did a lot of drilling--basic cross choke, armbar, and triangle from guard, then guard breaks (our choice; we just had to do ten times each).  Then came the "fun" part--one person on bottom, one on top in cross side.  We had 30 seconds for the bottom person to escape and top to mount.  Whoever lost (if anyone) had to do five push-ups.  Then we rotated so the person on bottom stayed and the one on top moved to the next person.  Yup, guess who did about a bajillion push-ups.  Then we worked with one person starting on the back, same kind of deal: back-taker works to submit, back-taken works to escape.  Most people were blue belts or higher, so I wasn't expecting to "win" any of these rounds, but I kept getting frustrated and more and more upset at how completely useless my supposedly almost-blue belt-level BJJ was.  I was tired from not being able to sleep well the night before, already working for over two hours before class even started, and for some reason I just couldn't get out of my head the feeling that I was being picked on for being the smallest one in class.  Not like for fun, but by the other smaller people, because I'm smaller than them and they can finally work on someone so they take full advantage of it.  The end of every round was an exercise in holding it together and not crying (or at least, letting people tell they were tears and not sweat).  Our last round, I go with a pretty strong (but not huge) blue belt, and I can feel him really working for his choke.  He has it in, but it's not really applied right, and then right before time ends, he tries to switch arms and instead ends up grinding his forearm into my larynx, sending me into a gross hacking/retching fit.

I know it was an accident.  But the mean negative part of me that's been growing lately is convinced that he was getting frustrated at not being able to choke a little white belt girl and so he did what he had to do to make me tap.  They gave us  a water break after that, but I could feel myself on the edge of a breakdown, so I discretely changed and left, hoping no one would try to talk to me on the way out.

There's something more that's wrong than just frustration with jiu jitsu, I know this.  Even as I write this, just thinking about it is making me emotional again.  Part of me is turning into an emotional wreck that cries when something is hard.  The other part is turning into a nasty beast that blames everyone else for her problems.  This is everything I used to not be and I hate it and I'm scared.  I want to say it's just vet school frustration and the jiu jitsu on top is what pushes me over the edge, but what if it's not?

Later I found out that one of my coaches thinks I'm having too-frequent breakdowns in class.  He saw the whole thing that happened yesterday, and saw that they guy didn't intentionally go for a calf crusher and thought I might have overreacted a little.  I will readily admit: I don't think he was going for a calf crusher.  I don't think that was his intention at all.  But I'm still upset that, to me, it felt like he didn't release me until I tapped, even after I yelled out.  And then he brought up another episode that happened last week, when Jess decided to grab me, turn me upside down (pinning my arms to my side in the process), and then let me drop down a little.  I started freaking out and it just got worse once she put me down.  No, I clearly didn't want to cry.  I don't think it was an appropriate reaction.  But is it overreacting?  I don't know.  Maybe he can be turned upside down, arms pinned to his sides, and feel like he was being dropped on his head.  And the worst part was that I felt like if I struggle to get out, I WOULD have fallen on my head, with no way to protect myself.  I had ZERO control in that situation, and it sucked.  I know she's just having fun, but she's not that much heavier than I am.  This is another one of those picking-on-the-small-person moments--she's not doing it be mean, but I feel like she was taking a little too much advantage of the fact that I'm smaller than her and she can throw me around.  And she's a brown belt, so it's not like I could really do anything to stop her.  She felt really bad about it after and apologized, so I don't think this kind of thing is going to happen again, but I just hate that it's coming up again.  I don't like it when I cry, and I don't like being reminded of it.

Anyways, I went to a nature park after I left the school.  I blasted My Chemical Romance on the way, which made me feel better right away.  One of the guides had their red-tailed hawk out, so he talked about her for awhile, and then their vet was also outside sunning their albino box turtle, so I talked to her for a bit also before going on a walk.  I felt so much lighter just seeing the hawk, and I really feel like I cleared my head.  Of course, revisiting it all right now brought all those feelings back, but I'm hoping that now I've let them out, they'll stay in the interwebz and out of my head.  I mean, life is good, right?  I am so lucky.  I'm in school for my dream career (of which I'm nearly 3/4 of the way through), I'm in good health, I learn BJJ at a school with two black belts (who came in for ME on a Saturday morning to do a test review!) and a high-level brown belt and it's not that far away or too expensive,  I finally have pets in my life, a family that loves me, people who care about me, food in the fridge and a roof over my head.  What more could I possibly want? 

One of those days...

Well, most of the day was actually pretty nice.  It was just later in the evening that went downhill.  I lifted today, and went for a hike at a nearby nature center because it was so nice outside. 

Beginner's class went fine; we mostly worked on self-defense from the back.  At the end we did a bunch of short rounds.  One of my rounds was with a really big new guy, and while I did survive, it was frustrating not being able to take advantage of his obvious mistakes, like getting my guard passed instead of armbarring him when he practically handed me his arm in my guard. 

Advanced class was somewhat simple, and now that I think about it was probably (at least partially) for my benefit.  We started with drilling an armbar just spinning your hips around to either side, then progressed to omoplatas.  The technique was a sweep or an armbar if they put a leg up and spinning your leg around.  For the sweep, hook your arm under their leg when they put their leg up.  Move your leg on that side up to clamp on their back, and bring the other leg around.  If they try to hunch down and tuck their head in, sweep by swinging your leg back, down under them, and push over with your clamped leg and bring that leg down as you come up, so you're in mount.  For the armbar, start with the same set-up and take it if they try to posture up and have their head straight up. 

After that, we did our guard-pass drill, and that's when shit went down. 

I went into this one blue belt guy's guard to start.  We've had our issues in the past, partially because he's really big and strong and sometimes he likes to mess around with people, and partially because I'm much smaller than him and "messing around" for him means "getting hurt" for me.  But I thought we were past these things and I was ok rolling with him again.  As I'm working to pass his guard, I'm not exactly sure what happened, but he made a quick move and grabbed something and the next thing I know, my calf is getting crushed and my knee is at kind of a weird angle.  I freaked out and yelped (mostly likely dropped some f-bombs), and he did nothing.  Then I tapped and he let go. I'm still sort of freaking out, about to hyperventilate, both from the pain and from getting stuck in that weird whatever-it-was, and one of my coaches came over and sent the guy away.  I told him I was ok and he pulled me up to go walk it off, but for some reason I just keep getting more and more upset about it.  I take a seat facing the back wall, and I did nothing but breathe and tried to relax.  Then my coach came over again, asked me if I was really ok, and then I started getting upset and almost crying again.  That's when he told me it seems like something more happened than what I let on, and then he walked away so I could collect myself.  It took me a little while, but I finally managed to calm down enough to join the class for the last few rounds of sparring.

As I'm changing out after class, I started thinking about what happened in my head and once again, I started getting upset about it.  I changed fast and left, and called my boyfriend (who also trains) once I got to my car.  Shocker of all shockers, I started bawling as soon as I called him.  I tried to explain what happened, except he basically bullied me into going back into the school and talking to my instructors.  I tried to convince him I could do it another day, but he wasn't having any of it.

So I go back into the academy, and of course the guy who this happened with was there, and he asked if I was ok, to which I said "no" and then I kind of got into with him, asking him why he did what he did, and then why he had to wait until I tapped to let go when it was obvious that I was in pain and needed out immediately.  He said that he had gotten his wrist stuck under my leg, and couldn't let go until I moved.  Of course, talking about it got me upset again, and I got more so when he told me I needed to calm down.  One of our other instructors had kind of worked his way on over by this point, so I just told the guy to forget about it and went and talked to my instructor.  I apologized for making a scene and explained my side of the story.  As I'm explaining what happened to him, our third instructor also comes in so he can hear it.  I kind of held it together, but for whatever reason, every time I try to talk about it I get upset.  In the end, he basically tells me that this guy does sometimes mess around with people, he's so strong he sometimes doesn't realize how much pressure he can be putting on someone.  But he would talk to him about it, and then asked me how I would like him to handle it as my instructor; if not rolling with him was a choice I wanted.  For now, I definitely think that's best, because I just don't feel safe rolling with him.  

I don't know why I get so upset when things like this happen.  There's no serious harm done, and as far as I can tell he didn't mean to really hurt me.  But something about the incident scared me, and his intent still remains cloudy to me, and I just can't fathom what was going on in his head.  Does he forget I'm small and skinny?  Does he forget that I'm not Jess, the brown belt?  Or does he really just not think about what he's about to pull?  Or is it more my fault for freaking out over getting stuck in a really awkward position that just took time to get out of?  Let me make something clear, I hate crying.  I almost never do it.  There are certain times, like finding out my cousin was in hospital with a ruptured brain aneurysm, that I just break down.  It didn't help that situation that I was really stressed out.  Then there are certain movies, like Hotel Rwanda or Up, that I can't help but get a little watery eyed.  But other than that, I really don't cry.  Or rather, I didn't cry until I started jiu jitsu.  Then I would have moments--really, every few months there would be a couple of weeks--where everything just seemed to be going wrong and it felt like certain people were being bullies.  Usually there's other stuff going on in my life when these "crying weeks" happened, but I'm on spring break right now--I'm supposed to be relaxed!

Oh, and I'm starting to get heart palpitations again.  Wonderful. 

De La Riva Day

 I finally made it to the weight room again.  Now that it's spring break,  I really should be able to work out as much as I want.   It did help that I had to be at school anyways for some Open House business.  Speaking of which, anyone and everyone in or around Knoxville, TN is invited to the annual UT College of Veterinary Medicine Open House on April 16. You get to see some really cool stuff if you come!

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Lots of De La Riva today, even during the beginner's class.  Started with established DLR when your opponent stands up in your guard--unlock your legs, grab a sleeve, sit your hips on one of their feet, put your far leg into their far hip, and wrap the other leg around the back and then inside of their inside leg, so you are at an angle to them.  If they pressure in, which they normally do when you push, take the inside leg and put that foot in the hip, take your foot that was in their far hip and drop it to behind their knee/calf, make sure your hand is around their foot (the one you're sitting on), and straighten the leg in the hip.  If they come back down, basically stand up in base--put the hand that was grabbing a sleeve in the collar, plant the other hand and opposite foot on the ground, and get up, swinging your hips back, making sure their leg is trapped with the leg that is swinging back.

Advanced class went from there--if the DLR wasn't as far off to the side and you're more lined up to the person, and then step their foot back to avoid that initial sweep, put the foot that was behind the calf in the hip that is closer to you, bring the foot that was in the hip all the way across to behind their ankle, but from in front of their leg, not behind.  Push the hip down, block with the hand and other foot.  Also, you could do the same stand up in base-sweep while they're standing.  Sit up and hug their leg and the arm you have.  Push their far side knee with your foot.  When they go to try and strip your foot with their hand, grab that hand and pull that into the hugging grip.  Keeping your head tight, drive in with your shoulder and pull back with your foot, keeping their foot clamped with yours.  When you land, you should have their wrist under their leg.  Keep it there and block the feet with your hands to come to cross side.

Andre Galvao...wow.

Just...blown away is all I can use to describe rolling with him.  But that came at the end.

Today at my school we hosted Andre Galvao for a seminar.  He was super nice right off the bat, and started us off with some light stretches.  We drilled a head and arm choke starting from half-guard a bit, and then he went into a bunch of half-guard stuff.  I really wish I had brought a notebook, but I'll have to do my best with the following (and this is likely out of order and missing tons of details):
-from top half guard, get the head and arm.  Put your forehead on the mat high, near their head, relax and extend your leg to pull it out of half guard and into mount.  Switch your feet to get both on the side that your body is on, drop your body to the floor and apply the choke.
-if the person curls up and grabs their own leg to stop the choke, take the Ezekiel--the arm that is under their arm grabs your sleeve of your other arm, bring that hand up over the head.  Make sure the arm grabbing the sleeve is deep, because that's the choking arm.  Bring your one knee into their shoulder and the other close to their back, then sit back and extend your arms in a scissor motion to apply.
-take the Ezekiel from back mount--go under one arm, use that hand to grab the sleeve of your other arm, and from there it's pretty much the same.  You can also do this if the other person turtles. 
-also from top deep half--grab their far side knee with one hand, close side lapel with other hand (four fingers inside), swim/shoot your forearm around their head, then sit back and apply the choke.
-top deep half--if they have their arm around your leg that is closer to their head--switch your feet so your weight is on the foot closer to their head, and your other knee is either on the ground or their thigh.  Grab their hand that is wrapped around your leg and push it into your hip and bite your body down on the hand.  You can use the other hand to post out at first.  Roll over their body, so your shoulder that is closer to their head comes down first, and aim your head towards their outer hip.  From here, both your legs are kind of under your partner's body.  The free hand should grab their belt, the other you can use to bring yourself up, and from here go one of two ways: 1) pull out the bottom leg and take their back, or 2) pull out the top leg and go for an omoplata.  If you can't submit right away and they roll forward with you, be sure to grab their legs as they roll, and then block their upper body from coming up so you can finish.
-From top deep half, if their arm is wrapped around your leg that is farther from their head, and their other arm is hidden: use your arm that is closer to their head to reach between your body and their head (don't trap the head!) and grab their belt.  Lean over their body and put your forehead on the mat.  Work your way down their body so your head is on their chest, and keep your belt-grabbing arm's elbow close to your body.  Use your other leg to scoop their far side leg so they can't upa into you.  Use your foot against their feet to break their half guard, pull out your leg and go to cross side.

I know there's more; I just can't remember it all!  Hopefully I'll get to drill some of this stuff this week, so I'll be able to make it muscle memory (at least a little) and have something to go to from top half.

After that, he wanted to spend 15-20 minutes rolling with people.  He had us all line up against the wall and then people just stepped forward as he tapped them.  One of the more annoying guys I train with decided to push me forward to "volunteer" me, although I'm actually a little glad because I didn't want to be the over-eager white belt who got to roll with Andre Galvao before all the blues and purples.

And that was were magic happened.  My jiu jitsu sucked; I know it.  We started from standing and I went for the sloppiest double leg ever, and somehow we got to the ground.  He let me work stuff, and we even got to half guard and I "did" one of the moves we learned (I'm sure more of it was him moving for me).  And yet his rolling was so smooth it made my crap-tastic jits feel like butter.  He let me finish him with (another sloppy) armbar, and then I went off to watch him play with his other toys.

This man doesn't have a single wasted movement.  Escaping from a position wasn't just that--it was establishing another dominant position, or setting up another submission.  Nothing, it seemed, was done with a purpose and a plan.  I've watched videos of Mundials and ADCC matches and all sorts of high-level jiu jitsu, but something was just different.  Maybe it's because such high-level athletes slow each other down and negate a lot of what the other does, or maybe he was just playing with us.  Honestly, I couldn't care less--it just left me with a very deep appreciation for what jiu jitsu can be, and how very desperately far away from it I am.